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27 November 2005 @ 07:10 pm
Veronica Mars Ficlet  
Title: Wings
Author: sweet_like_choc
Pairing/Character: Lilly, Ensemble
Word Count: 885
Rating: PG: 13 (for one bad word)
Summary: Lilly flew…
Spoilers/Warnings: Up to 1X22 Leave it to Beaver. No Season 2


Wings

When once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return. — Leonardo da Vinci


Lilly Kane had been able to fly since she was small. It didn’t really matter when she found out because after that she never looked back.

It must have been hard for her parents to have a toddler who flew just out of reach when in trouble. Her dad loved her for it. Her earliest memory was him throwing her up into the air and laughing when she didn’t come back down. Perhaps when she wasn’t there he had also cried- cried for his baby who would never stay in his arms when there were better things waiting above.

Her mother soon began to hate her because of it. She was jealous. When Lilly breathed she flew. When Celeste breathed each breath dragged her further under until she could no longer see the light.

It took her a while to realise that flying wasn’t normal. Most people didn’t see the world from far away. They would never know what she did- that no matter how bad something seemed- when you looked at it from up there it merged with everything else and became perfect.

As she grew older flying became less of a hobby and more what she lived for. She found that she needed that exhilaration to really feel anything at all.

Duncan could never understand Lilly’s eternal need for flight. If there was anybody who was fixed to the ground it was Donut. He looked up at Lily floating above him and saw an angel. She looked down and saw hell.

When she had begun to date Logan she thought that finally she could tell someone about her wings- someone who wanted to break free as much as her would understand. Instead he laughed it off, downed his drink. Later she thinks he is jealous too- she has seen the scars; his wings were ripped off at birth.

Veronica Mars was the first person outside her family to ever see her fly. Lilly had watched her get smaller and smaller as the smile on her face grew larger and larger. Veronica had laughed as she watched Lilly loop the loop above her. She had begged Lilly to teach her how, and Lilly had tried to coax the wings out of her friend. But no matter how hard Veronica tried her feet remained on the ground. Still she grew used to hanging out with Lilly floating above her. They both agreed that was how it was meant to be.

As she grew even older she found that there was less and less time for flight. Her family held her down and even Logan and Veronica were weights that she couldn’t shake off.

That was what had attracted her to Weevil. From the outside he appeared like her- like he didn’t give a fucking damn so long as he could feel alive. She had watched him and she had grown convinced- he had wings too. But the moment she removed his shirt she saw that was just a great illusion too. So she broke free and flew up into the sky- what was he but another person down below.

She had grown desperate. Her flights had become empty and meaningless with everyone holding her down. Until she was at Logan’s one day and his father had come in shirtless. She had cracked a joke and thought nothing of it until he had turned to leave. Then she had seen it- the flaps of skin behind which his wings hid.

So she made it her mission to fly with him. And slowly and surely he opened up to her and told her about his own wings- how he hid them on film sets and how it felt when you could no longer just take off whenever you wanted. There were always too many people watching, waiting for just that. He told her of how he had searched for someone like her- someone whose wings still shone with light.

They flew together and he took her higher and further than she had ever been before. Soon she left him behind to explore this new paradise of beauty.

But she couldn’t stay and as she felt herself sink downwards tears formed in her eyes for what she was giving up.

She’ll never know if she wanted what happened. With the tapes and the pool and then darkness.

It wasn’t dark for long.

Here for the first time there was nothing pulling her downwards. She flew up and up and simply danced among the clouds. This was how it was meant to be.

Her spirit had always been of air and not of earth. Still she returned occasionally. She saw Veronica use adversity and grief to discover that somewhere in her there were wings after all- even if she didn’t need them. She saw Logan mourn and grow- saw him accept Veronica’s wings in a way her brother never could. She saw her mother cry real tears over her body and she saw Aaron’s wings clipped once and for all. She saw it all but in the end it didn’t even matter.

She was Lilly Kane and she flew.
 
 
Current Mood: creativecreative
 
 
 
Mavericksolaris_burning on November 27th, 2005 07:47 pm (UTC)
Wow I loved it! Great images of Logan having his wings clipped and him accepting Veronica's wings.

My only problem is that Lilly is spelled with two ls.
A dreamer dreams, she never diessweet_like_choc on November 27th, 2005 07:52 pm (UTC)
Hee I just noticed this and fixed it!

Thank you- I'm glad you liked :)
sweet baby jesusmoirariordan on November 27th, 2005 09:23 pm (UTC)
Beautiful. I especially love the last line: "She was Lilly Kane and she flew." Awesome job.
Ari (creature of dust, child of God): Veronica Marswisdomeagle on November 29th, 2005 05:14 am (UTC)
[here from vm_navigator]

Wow. This is amazing in a way that it really shouldn't be. The image should be silly, but it's not. It's just so true to who Lilly is and what Neptune is and God, Lilly flies. Lilly's always been able to fly. I love Jake crying over it and Logan's wings being ripped off; I just... This is the very best use of metaphor. Seriously.

Typo: Lilly had watched her get smaller and smaller as the smile on her fact grew larger and larger. Should be face?